It has nothing to do with your lack of willpower
There are a few new articles out regarding researcher’s discoveries on the increase of disease and obesity since the 1980’s.
One thing they all agreed on is that the collective population did NOT have a spontaneous decrease in willpower.
“You might have the best willpower in the world, but if you don’t have access to the right food, the right environment, the best start in life… it will be tough.” Dr. Angel Chater
Definition of willpower: control exerted to do something or restrain impulses.
Argh. And we wonder why we are in a state of distress. I spent decades beating myself up to be a perfect nutritionist, skinnier, and jumping on extreme, fad diets.
Now, what I have learned is it has a LOT to do with how we observe and respond to stress and the feelings of safety.
If your environment doesn’t feel physically or emotionally safe, whether past or present, you may have a disconnected relationship with your body, mind and spirit. This can be what makes extreme diets alluring. You are looking for safety and to feel that connection within yourself.
And I will tell you a secret. Extremeness may cause even more disconnect. I am all about gentle, baby steps. These aren’t easy because our human condition wants instant results.
The middle path is the way.
My relationship with my body, gut and spirit felt VERY disconnected as a young person. I thought to have a safe life you were just supposed to do what you were told, work hard, get a job, get married, have kids, grandkids and then die.
Well, this rebellious nutritionist has not aligned with parts of this life model. But my life and nutrition journey has helped me discover how to feel nourished and safe within myself. THEN the added bonus is to be more accepting of others.
As we head into the holiday season, I don’t want you to have this constant mental stress of trying to do it ‘right’. The list of things we have to do every day just to take care of ourselves is daunting. Plus, if you have kids, special circumstances and traumatic life experiences, you may feel constantly overwhelmed, behind and not enough.
I am here to tell you, YOU are ENOUGH! And living life from not-enoughness is causing more harm to our bodies and well-being.
There was a missing ingredient in my Conscious Nutrition program. Besides sharing the information and science of what to eat, I noticed our not-enoughness, NOT lack of willpower was corrupting us every day.
Our 10,000 thoughts a day were repetitive and coming from our past programming and showing up like this in myself and my clients:
- Old limiting beliefs
- Past dieting rules and restrictions
- ‘Shoulding’ on themselves all-day
- Perfectionist syndrome (cause there is no such thing as a perfect diet, except you experiment with you)
- Feeling guilty for made-up reasons
- Judging themselves when they comfort eat
- Numbing out and not addressing the feelings associated with the numbness.
- Want to do an extreme, fad diet and then feeling defeated if they fell off.
- Lost the weight once and then it came back on and their life force feels diminished.
- Saying they want to change then rebelling the next day. (Totally me)
I use to DO and be all of these. Then one day, I realized I can question and be curious about all of these corrupted thoughts. My thoughts do not rule or define me.
Many philosophies of psychology suggest we program our subconscious from our family, surroundings, friends, and teachers from the ages of 0-9. These programs happen because the child’s brain activity is very receptive and operates primarily in the theta state, which is a bit hypnotic. While in the theta state, children spend much of their time mixing the imaginary world with the real world.
The problem is that we download our perceptions and beliefs about life, years before we acquire the ability for critical thinking. As young children, we download limiting or sabotaging beliefs, and those perceptions or misperceptions became our truths.
A non-food example I caught one day was, when I automatically responded to a friend about paying way too much for a concert ticket. RIGHT when I said it, I FELT a feeling that this wasn’t my belief but one that was handed down to me. SO PLEASE pay as much as you want for your favorite concert ticket that brings you immense joy, and don’t let anyone or YOUR small self tell you otherwise.
The good news is, whatever has been programmed can be deprogrammed and reprogrammed. WOO HOO!
The quality of the self-conscious mind endows humans with one of the most powerful forces in the Universe— the opportunity to express free will. ~Resource: Dr. Bruce Lipton.
It is NOT about your lack of willpower, nor is it about trying harder.
When we begin to reveal and unravel our patterns, habits, and programs, we can discern what we truly need.
I created Nourish YOUniversity to help us do just this.
Reveal, Unravel and take those SIMPLE baby steps every day vs. fighting for control and repressing your needs.
I will be hosting two LIVE webinars in January of 2023 to support you in NOT signing up for another extreme, radical program, that may leave you feeling depleted and frustrated.
Register today so you can feel safe, enjoy and be present for your holidays!
I will send out the webinar details the first week of January!
And if want more details about Nourish YOUniversity before the end of the year, please set up a time for us to chat!
Have a joyous holiday season,
with abundant nourishment,
Heather Fleming, C.C.N. Conscious. Compassion. Nutrition.